Het jy al gewonder wat is die titel van my Giddy storie?
Nou, ek ook.
Gelukkig het ek darem ‘n stukkie inspirasie gekry voordat ek hom verlede week moes instuur. Ek het hom “Uncles and Outlaws” gedoop.
Saterdagoggend vroeg het ek hom ingestuur en gedurende die naweek my naels byna tot by die elmboog afgekou.
Ek is nou amptelik deel van die honderd skrywers wat mense gaan lastigval om ‘n reuse bundel kortverhale te koop sodat ons ‘n Guinness Wêreldrekord kan breek.
Vandag is dit weer tyd vir ‘n karakteronderhoud, en ek gesels met Tom Selleck Jacob Nathaniel Doyle. Hy’s ‘n prettige oom.
Die skrywer: Doyle, my man! How are you?
Jacob Nathaniel Doyle (haal sy hoed af): Mornin’, ma’am! I’m doin’ mighty fine, and yourself?”
DS: Oh, still kicking.
JND: Good, good. I expect it’s time for the interview today?
DS: Indeed! Why do I get the feeling that you’re looking forward to this?
JND (skuif lekker agteroor in sy stoel, sit sy stewels op die tafel): You don’t?
DS: Frankly, no.
JND: Aww, that hurts, sweetheart.
DS: You’ll get over it. Now, are you ready for some questions?
JND: By all means, go ahead. Just don’t make it too boring, please. Like that posse scene from the first draft.
JND: You’ll get over it.
DS: You bet I will! Just remember I can still write a sequel. And kill you off in it.
JND: Point taken. Truce?
JND: Alright, what’s the first question?
DS: If you didn’t have to sleep, what would you do with the extra time?
JND: That would be exhausting. If I’m the only that don’t have to sleep, I’d probably read. I’ve always wanted to catch up on my Scott. But if everybody else in the world also have extra time…It’d be much the same, I guess. I’d still have to run around after bad guys most of the time.
DS: Do you like being sheriff of Rusty Tomb?
JND: Fair to middlin’. Nice folks mostly, but some messed-up ones too.
DS: That’s the way it is usually, huh? But how did you come to be sheriff? I don’t think I’ve asked you about that before.
JND: I was foreman on the McClane ranch, south of here, for quite a couple of years. I joined George McClane’s outfit when I was just a stubnosed kid of about fourteen, and after a while I became top man. I’ve always been pretty good with a gun, and pretty clear-headed where it came to the law and such, so when old sheriff Bronson passed away I guess I was the natural choice. The townspeople all liked me.
DS: So you’re actually a cowpuncher?
JND: Yup, and a good one, if I may say so myself. Or I used to be good, but it’s been a few year since I last worked a steer.
DS: Sjoe, I didn’t know that. Next question, which of your scars has the best story behind it?
JND: The kind of cross-shaped one on my side, I figure. You know the saying ‘never bring a knife to a gunfight’? Well, the reverse is also true. I once tried to break up a fight between two fellas going at each other with knives, and I near ended up getting my own innards ripped out.
DS: Knives are pretty freaky. I don’t like being on the wrong end of one myself. Now for the last question. What three things do you want to accomplish before you die, and how close are you to achieving them?
JND: Mm, that’s kind of personal, now ain’t it? Firstly, I’d say I want to get married, and secondly I want to have children of my own, and thirdly I want to learn how to cook. The first two…I’m hoping to accomplish soon. As for the last one, Hannah tells me that beef and beans aren’t proper cooking, so I guess I still have a long way to go.
DS: Ugh, I’m feeling kind of sad right now, you know?
JND: Why on earth?
DS: Well, I’m done writing Giddy’s story, so after these interviews I won’t talk to you guys in…maybe forever.
JND: Aww, I knew you liked us! But I’ve got an idea. Why don’t you make that sequel a promise instead of a threat? I know I could get either Gideon or Andrew to get up to some kind of tomfoolery. Gideon would like getting mixed up with some Injuns or bankrobbers or something.
DS: That’s a fantastic idea, actually! I’ll definitely work on it some. Thanks for being here, man! And good luck with keeping Giddy out of trouble, huh?
JND: Oh man, I’m going to need it. See you around!